Snow White is my favorite Disney Princess! I think mainly because when I was a young girl, she was one of the only princesses with dark hair, like mine, and she loved animals. Even though I grew up watching princesses, I didn’t think about beauty much. I guess it was around middle school when I began to notice that the “pretty girls” were the “popular girls” and that boys really weren’t interested in me. I started comparing my physical attributes and realized I didn’t measure up to the “popular girls”. I developed a negative self image. I had negative self thoughts and negative self talk. It continued to worsen as I got older. Negative self talk turned into self-loathing. I literally hated myself and all things about me. I felt as if I had zero worth and value. I compared myself to models in ads, women on the street and even considered plastic surgery. I was comparing myself to worldly beauty. I didn’t realize this was a problem until a couple of years ago my husband said to me, “It breaks my heart when you say things like that about yourself”. I was hurting him and our kids with my unhealthy self image.
I then realized that when I said something negative about myself, I was saying something negative about God’s creation. When I called myself ugly, I was calling God’s handiwork ugly, “For we are God’s masterpiece” (Ephesians 2:10). I didn’t like that feeling. It made me start to change how I viewed myself. I searched scripture to find what GOD says about me. I decided I didn’t want the world to be my standard of beauty, I wanted GOD to be my standard of beauty! “People judge by the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart” (1 Samuel 16:7b). My image of myself was created from lies I had believed from the enemy of my soul. And while this is difficult to write about, I want to be transparent and honest. I’m not fishing for compliments, I am seeking to help another who feels this way about themselves. We live in a world where people hide behind filters pretending things are perfect and look for their value in the number of “likes” they get. This world has set a standard of beauty that is unattainable and unrealistic. I don’t want to try to please this culture, I want to please the One who made me. He made me in HIS image, “So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them” (Genesis 1:27). I realized that I am not worthless, “for God bought you with a high price” (1 Corinthians 6: 20). That price was the life of Jesus, and Jesus wouldn’t give himself over to the cross for something that was worthless. I started to believe that God made me unique and exactly the way He wanted for ME to carry out HIS mission for my life, “God has given each of you a gift from His great variety of spiritual gifts. Use them to serve one another” (1 Peter 4: 10).
One of the best books I’ve ever read on finding our beauty in God is: Who Calls Me Beautiful: Finding Our True Image in the Mirror of God, by Regina Franklin. My sister gave me this book as a Christmas present and I am so in love with it’s message. This book talks about inner voices (things we say to ourselves) and outer voices (maybe things we’ve held on to from our childhood, or messages we get from others). It walks you through the lies we get from worldly beauty. It changes your perspective of beauty and shows us how God sees us. At the end of each chapter there are soul searching questions that you can journal through to understand WHY you feel this way and to point you to God. It has helped my self image so much!! I am reading through each chapter twice. The first time, I simply read the chapter, and the second time I highlight and journal through the questions. I love, love, love and highly recommend this book from Discovery House and Our Daily Bread Ministries! You can find it here: https://ourdailybreadpublishing.org/
Please hear my heart and know that I don’t think it’s wrong to take care of your appearance. I think we are called to take care of our bodies and our appearance. I also don’t think makeup, or wanting to look beautiful is a sin (I’m a Mary Kay Consultant and own about 45 lipsticks!). But MY issue came because of comparison and chasing after the wrong type of beauty. I am learning not to say, “No I’m not”, when my loving husband tells me how pretty I am. I am learning to embrace ME, the exact way God designed my body, and learning to love me the way I am. “For you created my inmost being; YOU knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am FEARFULLY and WONDERFULLY made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well” (Psalm 139:13-14). I pray I have helped someone with this post! Leave a comment and tell me how YOU embrace your Godly beauty! Thanks for reading.